Everybody's doing it.

[kukla_tko]

So. Ten things I have done that most people haven't.

Being that I don't KNOW "most people" I'm having some trouble sorting the list. Feel free to call me on any of these. I know for a fact that my upbringing was pretty far from the "Usual".

1. I was in a class that had a parent as a substitute teacher. (Also, I had the other parent mistaken for a substitute teacher. Different class.)

2. I performed in the Disneyworld Noon Parade.

3. snowtiger42 wouldn't tell what his #3 was. Shall I tell you mine? Nope. Can't tell you all this one either. The first time I did it it was a crime and I could go to jail for several reasons. Fortunately, no one pressed charges. There is some ambiguity about the criminal level of the subsequent times.

4. I have asked a pastor "the hard questions" in a religious class, and been rewarded for asking them.

5. I performed during the halftime show of the Citrus Bowl.

6. I have been pictured in local papers multiple times. (I lost count, actually.)

7. I created "character appearance" costumes based upon a children's cartoon series for a TV station. I also received large compliments from the DC people for my Batman costume in Chicago.

8. I have built a roaring fire in a firepit full of water.

9. I made a skinhead blush. Over his skinheadedness (as my SO puts it.) Later, the skinhead cried on my shoulder. He was not emotionally prepared for that "suburban backyard Barbeque." It was hosted by Fen.

10. I would say that I performed in the Floor Show for the Rocky Horror Picture show, but that's not uncommon. No, I RAN the floorshow for Rocky Horror. And we handed out condoms and lube. In an easter egg hunt.



Like most people, this is a list of "cool" things that I have done, but most people have not.

However. This is the Big Ol' Dork show, so here's my OTHER ten things I have done, but most people haven't.

Hey, Y'all! Watch THIS:

1. I attempted to urinate discreetly on a playground, and succeed only in soaking my clothes.

2. I have broken a tooth on the monkey bars, then spent the rest of the afternoon *looking for the tooth* before I went to the hospital.

3. I have fallen more than a story, several times (but never recieved any wounds requiring stitches or broken bones from the fall.)

4. Once, I was sent to detention, but ended up in IVC instead. (Detention was for smaller infractions of the rules. IVC went for another two hours and was for the REALLY bad kids.) Did I point out my mistake and go home after detention was over? Nope. Sat there like a starvin' dork.

5. Somehow I managed to get semen up into my sinuses. (DO NOT ASK.)

6. I have accidentally peed on a lover. (Oddly enough, I haven't done this on purpose.)

7. I broke my finger playing volleyball. Sound usual? Didn't get it looked at for a whole week.

8. I got a massage from a teacher. In front of the whole class.

9. I made this second list.

10. I recently dropped my entire box of groceries in the middle of the store, breaking several glass jars of sticky and wet stuff.

Comments

[hick0ry.livejournal.com]

that second list is awesome. reminds me of the time was successful in discretely dephecating at the edge of a cemetery only to realize there was nothing remotely usephul for wiping my ass. I used a sock, and abanonded it at the scene ... gave myself a blister walking home without it.