This will give me nightmares.
Dec. 19th, 2011 01:18 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kukla_tkoI was cruising Ebay, like I do, when I came across a terrifying photo.
Now, the last time this happened, I bought the damn thing. Some of you might remember the "Inappropriate Lap Dance" Joker figure. Heh.
However, this time... I'm mostly just still reeling from the realization that someone thinks that someone will pay money for this doll.
http://www.ebay.com/itm/Vintage-1973-Mod-Hair-Ken-Doll-original-70s-clothes-LOT-Now-Look-Leather-Jacket-/190614648634?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item2c6184b73a#ht_500wt_1046
Let's start with the part where his facial screening makes him look like Bill Bixby when he was wearing the facial prosthetics for the half-way point of his change into the Hulk. Those... greasepaint eyebrows are terrified of each other and running in opposite directions.
His eyes are "bananas", and not looking at the same thing at the same time. He's sporting Ken's signature "Eunich Smile" but in a way that makes me wonder if he hid dynamite somewhere and then forgot about it.
Then, of course, there's the condition of the piece. This auction reads like that old joke "lost dog" poster where the dog is identified as being three-legged, blind in one eye, tailless and answers to the name of "Lucky".
The doll is vintage, has completely jacked-up hair (matted, possibly melted, *AND* cut), and...
And...
AND IS MISSING A HAND! Now, at first glance (after the creeping horrors died down) I thought perhaps this was a Ken doll like my "Sport N Shave" Ken, with rooted hair and articulated hands and arms. As such, it's not particularly difficult for one of these dolls to have joint failure at the wrist and pop off a hand.
No. someTHING chewed off his hand at the wrist! His hands and arms are (were?) a single molded plastic piece.
This doll has stared into the abyss and it has stared back. When the horror-movie cliches start, THIS IS THE DOLL TO BURN AND BURY.
Don't encourage this seller. Please. Don't.
Now, the last time this happened, I bought the damn thing. Some of you might remember the "Inappropriate Lap Dance" Joker figure. Heh.
However, this time... I'm mostly just still reeling from the realization that someone thinks that someone will pay money for this doll.
http://www.ebay.com/itm/Vintage-1973-Mod-Hair-Ken-Doll-original-70s-clothes-LOT-Now-Look-Leather-Jacket-/190614648634?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item2c6184b73a#ht_500wt_1046
Let's start with the part where his facial screening makes him look like Bill Bixby when he was wearing the facial prosthetics for the half-way point of his change into the Hulk. Those... greasepaint eyebrows are terrified of each other and running in opposite directions.
His eyes are "bananas", and not looking at the same thing at the same time. He's sporting Ken's signature "Eunich Smile" but in a way that makes me wonder if he hid dynamite somewhere and then forgot about it.
Then, of course, there's the condition of the piece. This auction reads like that old joke "lost dog" poster where the dog is identified as being three-legged, blind in one eye, tailless and answers to the name of "Lucky".
The doll is vintage, has completely jacked-up hair (matted, possibly melted, *AND* cut), and...
And...
AND IS MISSING A HAND! Now, at first glance (after the creeping horrors died down) I thought perhaps this was a Ken doll like my "Sport N Shave" Ken, with rooted hair and articulated hands and arms. As such, it's not particularly difficult for one of these dolls to have joint failure at the wrist and pop off a hand.
No. someTHING chewed off his hand at the wrist! His hands and arms are (were?) a single molded plastic piece.
This doll has stared into the abyss and it has stared back. When the horror-movie cliches start, THIS IS THE DOLL TO BURN AND BURY.
Don't encourage this seller. Please. Don't.
