kukla_tko | Creepier than thou

Ok. I was going to do announcements about the Goblin Ball, or my progress in working out my business plan and grant proposals.
Are you emotionally prepared for what I have written about instead?

Most of you probably are. But it does push WAY past the boundaries of good taste.
Ready?

Then I read

bradhicks's friend list, or rather part of it.

I read

theferret's most recent entry. It opens with a brilliant comparison between a cold/sinus infection/runny nose with menstruation.
Just go read it. I laughed long and hard.

Then he goes on to describe a game he plays on the subway.

In

theferret's game, it works like this: Pretend that something cosmic or catastrophic occurs, and the people in the compartment are now the last humans alive. He then gets his priorities in order:
Sex: If he is to repopulate the earth, which female will he choose to do this with? Which woman is he most likely to fall upon like a crazed -uh- Weasel and attempt to mate with?
As a corollary to this step, he then tries to decide which of the males he would have to compete with.

Now, I could say that I was outraged by this, and get out my dusty feminist soapbox and wail about his caveman instincts.

But I never got that far, because I immediately recognized the game.

And I realized that I play that same game sometimes, if I am "trapped" in a room with other humans, particularly strangers (or even co-workers, if I don't know them well.)

I don't take such a long view of it. No, no. See, I am slightly more concerned about survival, and so when I start to wonder what would happen if the universe imploded (except for this compartment of humans) my priorities are different.
My first priorities are actually: Water, food, clothing, shelter. The basics.
So, I size up the people in the compartment for fitness, stored body fat, and strength.
When I get to the post-apocalyptic fantasy, I am trying to figure out who we're going to eat first. I realized that if you are very fit, but have very little stored energy, you are going to keel over very quickly. Unless, of course, you take down a fat person and eat them first. I myself look for the weak, smaller ones. The ones who probably won't make it because they aren't strong enough or fat enough to survive. And look out for the strong fat ones. Of course, if someone does something to piss me off or irritate me, they rise quickly to the top of the list.

See, I am against killing (for the most part.) I am a humanitarian (and not in the sense that vegetarians eat vegetables.)

But... I do get out my primal self and let it play from time to time. In fantasy, in mental exercise and occasionally when I need to get medieval on someone's @ss. (In SMALL doses.)
It is my primal self that knows that I would never shoot to kill. If I am going to go to all the trouble of killing someone, of taking a life, I am going to get my hands wet.

So while I was reading about

theferret's strategies, I wondered briefly what would happen if the two of us met on a subway or some such. Would he choose me as his "acceptable breeding partner" and immediately start posturing and taking out the other males in an effort to reach me?
If so, it would be amusing if I had him all picked out as a food source...
Mr. Ferret? Nice to meet you. Call me Ms. Mantis.

Oh. And as to the sex question; Sometimes I do look at the men and try to decide which of them I might procreate with. Heh. Mostly it's a process of elimination. I don't pick one, I eliminate the unsatisfactory ones. Sometimes that means that there are NO males in the compartment with whom I would mate.

Heh. I wonder what THAT would do to the Ferret's fantasy?

Oh. And one more thing. My higher self does not fantasize about eating people (very often.) But I do like to play with taboos in my head, and roll them around, trying to figure out how I REALLY feel about some of them. However, I have noticed that I can clear a room and stop all conversation cold by even vaguely alluding to the possibility of taboo subjects like Cannibalism.

And besides. I would never eat someone who I didn't love and respect enough to follow their last "Heinleinian" wish to grok them.
It just isn't done.

:)