Ode to a Pig
May. 28th, 2004 09:58 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kukla_tkoI am heading out to Lothlorien between 1-2pm this afternoon. Won't hear from me again until Monday at the earliest.
To tide you over, I am sharing the "Ode to a Pig" ritual (performance art) script that we will use at the Tiki Party and Feast.
Cast is:
The Wild Pig/Priestess Boom-Sha-Ka-lic-Ah: Me
The Young Hunter: My SO
The Narrator:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
bradhicks
Stage manager: Allura
There will be a "jungle screen" for the pig to hide behind (Held by two people.) The "lagoon" set for the pig and the hunter to run around will just use a piece of blue sparkly fabric around which the "hunter" chases the "pig."
For costumes, the Hunter may get an oversized mask, but he will definitely get to wear a sarong or loincloth. As the Wild Pig, I will wear a jungle-print scarf like a sarong, and a bright pink mask. I also will have a cute curly tail.
Ode to a Pig (or "The Mighty Hunter's Journey")
Opening introduction:
Priestess Boom-Sha-Ka-lic-Ah: Aloha! Come with me, back to a time of innocent pleasures and heavily mixed rum drinks. Go back to the time of Tiki, when Americans sought an exotic getaway, and discovered Tiki "culture." A time when family restaurants featured pictures of topless, beautiful hula dancers. When American logs were sent to Malaysian carvers to be turned into "Tiki god statues."
(Drummers begin chanting)
Ha-Ha! E-Ah-who-la-ula
Ha-Ha! E-Ah-who-la-ula
Priestess Boom-Sha-Ka-lic-Ah: We call forth the Chief of the tribe, the King of the sacred party, the Big Kahuna: Come forth, E-Ah-who-la-ula!
Drummers: Wider is Better!
Priestess: Ha-Ha! E-Ah-who-la-ula!
Drummers: Wider Is Better!
Priestess: Welcome, great and mighty Kahuna!
Drummers: E-Ah-who-la-ula!
DRUMS: Slow, simple rhythm. Hypnotic, if possible. Might add pan-flute or random jungle noises.
Narrator/Kahuna: "For centuries, the mightiest hunters always hunted the boar. Today, a young hunter wishes to prove his might, and endure his rite of passage into manhood by hunting the Wild Pig."
Hunter: *appears.*
DRUMS: The Hunter should get a theme of some kind. Some kind of noise that is "his". A rattle or a new deep drum sound.
Narrator: "He takes his spear in his hand, hefting its weight. Such a long, firm, powerful spear. He is proud, for this spear was passed down to him from his father, and his father's father. He was fond of polishing it until it gleamed."
Hunter: *hefts spear, holds it "just so" and is unaware of any innuendo. Polishes it lovingly.*
DRUMS: Build upon the simple rhythm, give us a "Stalking" sound.
Narrator: "The hunter begins his journey, into the jungle. He searches high, he searches low. But he is unable to find the clever Wild Pig."
Hunter: *allows spear to droop in disappointment. Continues blissful unawareness of any innuendo.*
DRUMS: Peter off, slow in disappointment.
Narrator: "Suddenly, from within the brush, he hears a sound!"
DRUMS: Silent, listening.
Pig: *makes rustling noise. Wriggles so that rear end with pig tail is
visible through the "leaves".*
Narrator: "The hunter has spied his prey!"
DRUMS: Pick up again with a faster beat, a wild heartbeat. The hunter's theme is very strong.
Hunter: *Spear leaps to attention. Begins to stealthily stalk the pig.*
Narrator: "Closer and closer the hunter crept. As he neared the wild pig, she
seemed to sense his presence..."
DRUMS: "Pig's Theme" should appear at this point. Maybe a flute or a Zill or a shaker of some kind.
Pig: "Oink?" *Looks around and spies the hunter. Winks to the audience, and wiggles suggestively at the Hunter. Begins to run, but not very fast.*
Narrator: "The Wild Pig has spotted him! Now he must begin the great chase. She leads him on a merry run, through the jungle, to a blue lagoon." (Stretch for time if necessary)
Hunter: *chases pig, as she makes cute noises at him and occasionally stops just long enough to let him catch up. Flirty chase. End up at the "lagoon".*
DRUMS: for the Lagoon Chase, it should build and build until the pig gets so far ahead that she trips up the hunter. Then we should get a "Cheer" or some "Laughter" from the drums.
Narrator: "Suddenly, he captures his prey, but she wriggles out of his grasp. She runs around and around the lagoon, until he finally captures her! Taking his mighty spear in hand, he thrusts it into the pig."
Pig: *Squeals in delight*
DRUMS: Ok, now some 70's porno music. Or something similar. Sexy, silly.
Narrator: "Again and again, he thrusts into her, taking different angles to make sure the job is done properly. Finally, his prey vanquished, and might of his spear spent, he drags his succulent pig back to his village, to be enjoyed by all at the luau.
DRUMS: after the, er, climax... back to the original simple rhythm from the beginning.
Pig: *Raising head from blissful Little Death.*"Oink? The WHOLE village? Oh, MY!"
Narrator: "So together we give thanks to the pig, who sacrificed its life that we might have this magnificent feast. All hail the pig!"
DRUMS: Budda-bump.
All: All Hail The PIG!
Narrator: All hail the pig!"
DRUMS: Budda-bump.
All: All Hail The PIG!
Narrator: (If different from Big Kahuna) Kahuna E-Ah-who-la-ula, what shall we have now?
Kahuna: Dancing girls!
Narrator: Bring out the Hula Dancers!
(If the Big Kahuna is the narrator, just have him call for the dancing girls.)
And now the first draft of Ritual 2, which was originally going to include a firewalk. Now it just looks like a silly fraternity initiation rite.
Ritual 2: The Blessing of the Tiki
Priestess: We have gathered, we have feasted, and now we do homage to the Tiki Gods.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We call out to the spirits of Tiki, grant us your gentle blessing, and forgive us if our rituals are crude.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: Do not bring your wrath upon us, here at Lothlorien; the land of a thousand shrines, we wish to honor your memory, and welcome you to the lands protected by the Elves.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We humbly request that Maui slow the sun that we may have all the time we need to have a proper celebration.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We solemnly revere the spirits of polynesia, and ask that they maintain good humor and show us their favor.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We beg that you spare us from the wrath of Pele, the whims of ().
Chanters: Oh-ow-the-fuck-ow-ow
Priestess: And now, we offer a dance in honor of the Spirits of Tiki.
(Insert Hula here)
Priestess: We shall now anoint the Tiki Pole.
Dancers/priestesses:*Get bottle of lube or oil and lube up the plastic "tiki pole" with it, very sensual and dramatic.*
Priestess: Who comes forth as a petitioner to the Tiki Pole?
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: Who comes forth to offer themselves as virgin sacrifice to the P'a'ar tae joH'a'?
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: In order to become worthy of the blessings of P'a'ar tae joH'a', you must first purify yourself. Come, purifying darkness!
(Initiates are blindfolded)
Priestess: Come, purifying fire!
(Incense burner is waved about them)
Priestess: Come, purifying water!
(Bucket of water is thrown at them)
Priestess: Come, Purifying Alcohol!
(Initiates are given a drink of rum)
Priestess: These four elements are most conducive to the way of the P'a'ar tae joH'a'. Now you must withstand the path of screaming. Are you ready? Go!
Priestesses guide the initiates through a gauntlet of people with feathers, tickling them.
Priestess: You are now ready to present yourself to be sacrificed! (Party god ritual statement, Hula girls "sacrifice" the boys, and Warriors "sacrifice" the girls.)
Priestess: and now, you shall be Lei'd. When I present this lei to you, you must answer me one question. If you answer truthfully, you receive the lei. If you choose not to answer, you offer a kiss instead. Like so: (Performs the Lei ceremony on another Team member)
Once you receive the lei, you must pass it on, and so forth, until everyone has had a turn.
Let the party begin!
(EDIT)
Here's the final draft of the Tiki Blessing rite:
Ritual 2: The Blessing of the Tiki
Priestess: We have gathered, we have feasted, and now we do homage to the Tiki Gods.
Chanters: Tiki Gods, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We call out to the spirits of Tiki, grant us your gentle blessing, and forgive us if our rituals are crude.
Chanters: Rituals, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: Do not bring your wrath upon us. Here at Lothlorien; the land of a thousand shrines, we wish to honor your memory, and welcome you to the lands protected by the Elves.
Chanters: Lothlorien, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We humbly request that Maui slow the sun that we may have all the time we need to have a proper celebration.
Chanters: Maui, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We solemnly revere all the spirits of polynesia, authentic or imaginary and ask that they maintain good humor and show us their favor.
Chanters: Favor, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We beg that you spare us from the wrath of Pele, the whims of Hina.
Chanters: Oh-ow-the-fuck-ow-ow
Priestess: And now, we offer a dance in honor of the Spirits of Tiki.
(Insert Hula here)
Priestess: We shall now anoint the Tiki Pole.
Chanters: Tiki Pole, Ooh ha ha!
Dancers/priestesses: Get bottle of lube or oil and lube up the plastic "tiki pole" with it, very sensual and dramatic.
Priestess: Who comes forth as a petitioner to the Tiki Pole?
Chanters: Tiki Pole, Ooh ha ha!
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: Who comes forth to offer themselves as virgin sacrifice to the P'a'ar tae joH'a'?
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: In order to become worthy of the blessings of P'a'ar tae joH'a', you must first purify yourself. Come, purifying darkness!
Chanters: Darkness, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Blindfold Initiates
Priestess: Come, purifying fire!
Chanters: Fire, fire, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Wave incense burner, smudge, or smoking torch around Initiates.
Priestess: Come, purifying water!
Chanters: Watch out, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Throw bucket of water or squirt Initiates with squirt gun.
Priestess: Come, Purifying Alcohol!
Chanters: Chug, chug, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Offer drinks to Initiates.
Priestess: You have been prepared for the way of the P'a'ar tae joH'a'. Now you must withstand the path of screaming. Are you ready? Go!
Priestesses: guide the initiates through a gauntlet of people with feathers, tickling them.
(chanting and drumming)
Chanters: Hee hee hee Whoo… Hee hee hee whoo…
Priestess: You are now ready to present yourself to be sacrificed! (Party god ritual statement, Hula girls "sacrifice" the boys, and Warriors "sacrifice" the girls.)
Priestess: and now, you shall be Lei'd. (Explain the Lei ceremony)
To tide you over, I am sharing the "Ode to a Pig" ritual (performance art) script that we will use at the Tiki Party and Feast.
Cast is:
The Wild Pig/Priestess Boom-Sha-Ka-lic-Ah: Me
The Young Hunter: My SO
The Narrator:
bradhicks Stage manager: Allura
There will be a "jungle screen" for the pig to hide behind (Held by two people.) The "lagoon" set for the pig and the hunter to run around will just use a piece of blue sparkly fabric around which the "hunter" chases the "pig."
For costumes, the Hunter may get an oversized mask, but he will definitely get to wear a sarong or loincloth. As the Wild Pig, I will wear a jungle-print scarf like a sarong, and a bright pink mask. I also will have a cute curly tail.
Ode to a Pig (or "The Mighty Hunter's Journey")
Opening introduction:
Priestess Boom-Sha-Ka-lic-Ah: Aloha! Come with me, back to a time of innocent pleasures and heavily mixed rum drinks. Go back to the time of Tiki, when Americans sought an exotic getaway, and discovered Tiki "culture." A time when family restaurants featured pictures of topless, beautiful hula dancers. When American logs were sent to Malaysian carvers to be turned into "Tiki god statues."
(Drummers begin chanting)
Ha-Ha! E-Ah-who-la-ula
Ha-Ha! E-Ah-who-la-ula
Priestess Boom-Sha-Ka-lic-Ah: We call forth the Chief of the tribe, the King of the sacred party, the Big Kahuna: Come forth, E-Ah-who-la-ula!
Drummers: Wider is Better!
Priestess: Ha-Ha! E-Ah-who-la-ula!
Drummers: Wider Is Better!
Priestess: Welcome, great and mighty Kahuna!
Drummers: E-Ah-who-la-ula!
DRUMS: Slow, simple rhythm. Hypnotic, if possible. Might add pan-flute or random jungle noises.
Narrator/Kahuna: "For centuries, the mightiest hunters always hunted the boar. Today, a young hunter wishes to prove his might, and endure his rite of passage into manhood by hunting the Wild Pig."
Hunter: *appears.*
DRUMS: The Hunter should get a theme of some kind. Some kind of noise that is "his". A rattle or a new deep drum sound.
Narrator: "He takes his spear in his hand, hefting its weight. Such a long, firm, powerful spear. He is proud, for this spear was passed down to him from his father, and his father's father. He was fond of polishing it until it gleamed."
Hunter: *hefts spear, holds it "just so" and is unaware of any innuendo. Polishes it lovingly.*
DRUMS: Build upon the simple rhythm, give us a "Stalking" sound.
Narrator: "The hunter begins his journey, into the jungle. He searches high, he searches low. But he is unable to find the clever Wild Pig."
Hunter: *allows spear to droop in disappointment. Continues blissful unawareness of any innuendo.*
DRUMS: Peter off, slow in disappointment.
Narrator: "Suddenly, from within the brush, he hears a sound!"
DRUMS: Silent, listening.
Pig: *makes rustling noise. Wriggles so that rear end with pig tail is
visible through the "leaves".*
Narrator: "The hunter has spied his prey!"
DRUMS: Pick up again with a faster beat, a wild heartbeat. The hunter's theme is very strong.
Hunter: *Spear leaps to attention. Begins to stealthily stalk the pig.*
Narrator: "Closer and closer the hunter crept. As he neared the wild pig, she
seemed to sense his presence..."
DRUMS: "Pig's Theme" should appear at this point. Maybe a flute or a Zill or a shaker of some kind.
Pig: "Oink?" *Looks around and spies the hunter. Winks to the audience, and wiggles suggestively at the Hunter. Begins to run, but not very fast.*
Narrator: "The Wild Pig has spotted him! Now he must begin the great chase. She leads him on a merry run, through the jungle, to a blue lagoon." (Stretch for time if necessary)
Hunter: *chases pig, as she makes cute noises at him and occasionally stops just long enough to let him catch up. Flirty chase. End up at the "lagoon".*
DRUMS: for the Lagoon Chase, it should build and build until the pig gets so far ahead that she trips up the hunter. Then we should get a "Cheer" or some "Laughter" from the drums.
Narrator: "Suddenly, he captures his prey, but she wriggles out of his grasp. She runs around and around the lagoon, until he finally captures her! Taking his mighty spear in hand, he thrusts it into the pig."
Pig: *Squeals in delight*
DRUMS: Ok, now some 70's porno music. Or something similar. Sexy, silly.
Narrator: "Again and again, he thrusts into her, taking different angles to make sure the job is done properly. Finally, his prey vanquished, and might of his spear spent, he drags his succulent pig back to his village, to be enjoyed by all at the luau.
DRUMS: after the, er, climax... back to the original simple rhythm from the beginning.
Pig: *Raising head from blissful Little Death.*"Oink? The WHOLE village? Oh, MY!"
Narrator: "So together we give thanks to the pig, who sacrificed its life that we might have this magnificent feast. All hail the pig!"
DRUMS: Budda-bump.
All: All Hail The PIG!
Narrator: All hail the pig!"
DRUMS: Budda-bump.
All: All Hail The PIG!
Narrator: (If different from Big Kahuna) Kahuna E-Ah-who-la-ula, what shall we have now?
Kahuna: Dancing girls!
Narrator: Bring out the Hula Dancers!
(If the Big Kahuna is the narrator, just have him call for the dancing girls.)
And now the first draft of Ritual 2, which was originally going to include a firewalk. Now it just looks like a silly fraternity initiation rite.
Ritual 2: The Blessing of the Tiki
Priestess: We have gathered, we have feasted, and now we do homage to the Tiki Gods.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We call out to the spirits of Tiki, grant us your gentle blessing, and forgive us if our rituals are crude.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: Do not bring your wrath upon us, here at Lothlorien; the land of a thousand shrines, we wish to honor your memory, and welcome you to the lands protected by the Elves.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We humbly request that Maui slow the sun that we may have all the time we need to have a proper celebration.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We solemnly revere the spirits of polynesia, and ask that they maintain good humor and show us their favor.
Chanters: Uh-oh ha-ha whee!
Priestess: We beg that you spare us from the wrath of Pele, the whims of ().
Chanters: Oh-ow-the-fuck-ow-ow
Priestess: And now, we offer a dance in honor of the Spirits of Tiki.
(Insert Hula here)
Priestess: We shall now anoint the Tiki Pole.
Dancers/priestesses:*Get bottle of lube or oil and lube up the plastic "tiki pole" with it, very sensual and dramatic.*
Priestess: Who comes forth as a petitioner to the Tiki Pole?
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: Who comes forth to offer themselves as virgin sacrifice to the P'a'ar tae joH'a'?
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: In order to become worthy of the blessings of P'a'ar tae joH'a', you must first purify yourself. Come, purifying darkness!
(Initiates are blindfolded)
Priestess: Come, purifying fire!
(Incense burner is waved about them)
Priestess: Come, purifying water!
(Bucket of water is thrown at them)
Priestess: Come, Purifying Alcohol!
(Initiates are given a drink of rum)
Priestess: These four elements are most conducive to the way of the P'a'ar tae joH'a'. Now you must withstand the path of screaming. Are you ready? Go!
Priestesses guide the initiates through a gauntlet of people with feathers, tickling them.
Priestess: You are now ready to present yourself to be sacrificed! (Party god ritual statement, Hula girls "sacrifice" the boys, and Warriors "sacrifice" the girls.)
Priestess: and now, you shall be Lei'd. When I present this lei to you, you must answer me one question. If you answer truthfully, you receive the lei. If you choose not to answer, you offer a kiss instead. Like so: (Performs the Lei ceremony on another Team member)
Once you receive the lei, you must pass it on, and so forth, until everyone has had a turn.
Let the party begin!
(EDIT)
Here's the final draft of the Tiki Blessing rite:
Ritual 2: The Blessing of the Tiki
Priestess: We have gathered, we have feasted, and now we do homage to the Tiki Gods.
Chanters: Tiki Gods, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We call out to the spirits of Tiki, grant us your gentle blessing, and forgive us if our rituals are crude.
Chanters: Rituals, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: Do not bring your wrath upon us. Here at Lothlorien; the land of a thousand shrines, we wish to honor your memory, and welcome you to the lands protected by the Elves.
Chanters: Lothlorien, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We humbly request that Maui slow the sun that we may have all the time we need to have a proper celebration.
Chanters: Maui, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We solemnly revere all the spirits of polynesia, authentic or imaginary and ask that they maintain good humor and show us their favor.
Chanters: Favor, Ooh ha ha!
Priestess: We beg that you spare us from the wrath of Pele, the whims of Hina.
Chanters: Oh-ow-the-fuck-ow-ow
Priestess: And now, we offer a dance in honor of the Spirits of Tiki.
(Insert Hula here)
Priestess: We shall now anoint the Tiki Pole.
Chanters: Tiki Pole, Ooh ha ha!
Dancers/priestesses: Get bottle of lube or oil and lube up the plastic "tiki pole" with it, very sensual and dramatic.
Priestess: Who comes forth as a petitioner to the Tiki Pole?
Chanters: Tiki Pole, Ooh ha ha!
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: Who comes forth to offer themselves as virgin sacrifice to the P'a'ar tae joH'a'?
Initiates: We do.
Priestess: In order to become worthy of the blessings of P'a'ar tae joH'a', you must first purify yourself. Come, purifying darkness!
Chanters: Darkness, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Blindfold Initiates
Priestess: Come, purifying fire!
Chanters: Fire, fire, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Wave incense burner, smudge, or smoking torch around Initiates.
Priestess: Come, purifying water!
Chanters: Watch out, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Throw bucket of water or squirt Initiates with squirt gun.
Priestess: Come, Purifying Alcohol!
Chanters: Chug, chug, Ooh ha ha!
Assistant Priests: Offer drinks to Initiates.
Priestess: You have been prepared for the way of the P'a'ar tae joH'a'. Now you must withstand the path of screaming. Are you ready? Go!
Priestesses: guide the initiates through a gauntlet of people with feathers, tickling them.
(chanting and drumming)
Chanters: Hee hee hee Whoo… Hee hee hee whoo…
Priestess: You are now ready to present yourself to be sacrificed! (Party god ritual statement, Hula girls "sacrifice" the boys, and Warriors "sacrifice" the girls.)
Priestess: and now, you shall be Lei'd. (Explain the Lei ceremony)
